Please Keep Using the Polyamorous Symbols You Love

Kristian E.

Jul 18, 20212 min read

different symbols of polyamory appear in an open window on a old pixellated computer desktop. the symbols clockwise from top-right: the original infinity heart design (red heart, blue infinity). a ring of six interlocking hearts of varying colors, with the points facing outward, encircling a black infinity sign. a pixellated macaw. an early 2000s computer-generated "3D" infinity heart (red heart, blue infinity), the polyamorous pride flag with pi symbol designed by Jim Evans in 1995. — oldies but goodies. some of the oldest polyamorous symbols in the book.

Dear Polyamorist,

In November 2021*, we’re going to host a vote on a new Polyamorous pride flag. We want you to vote. We want a new flag that you’ve had a say in and that you’re excited about. [*EDIT: the vote has been postponed, dates TBD.]

As evidenced by the countless attempts at redesigning it, the polyamorous community wants a more inviting, more aesthetically appealing flag. We’re working to make that happen.

It’s important to us that you know we mean no harm or disrespect to the symbols you’ve used to identify yourself as polyamorous up to this point. Frankly, they’re not going anywhere. And we don’t expect them to.

That’s part of the reason we spoke to Jim Evans, creator of the original polyamorous pride flag, before we got this project going. Kind and thoughtful, Jim expressed interest in our project and support for whatever the community may decide.

We promised to treat his flag with the honor it deserves and preserve its place in the history of modern polyamory. We intend to have the new design pay careful homage to Jim’s contribution to our community.

Please know that your infinity heart tattoo will be no more or less meaningful than it is now if the new polyamorous pride flag doesn’t include the infinity heart. The original “pi” pride flag you have stored somewhere in your garage won’t suddenly disappear when a new flag gets announced.

We have no desire to sweep these symbols under the proverbial rug.

What we do want is something designed exclusively for polyamory. We know not everyone will feel represented by it; that’s flatly not possible.

We’re not asking you to love what we create, though we hope you do come to love our new flag.

We’re just asking you to be open to trusting us to create something a large portion of our community will feel excited about and proud of, even if you personally don’t.

We’re asking you to embrace what may feel like a big and disruptive change with the knowledge that we’re putting the normalization, destigmatization, and visibility of worldwide polyamory at the very forefront of everything we’re doing.

With Every Ounce of My Love,